at the right time

sometimes ill look at someone else's thoughts
and think
wow
thats ..beautiful
like, who they are
the things they think and talk about
the things they care about
its all just, really beautiful

and then sin creeps up
to say, dont you wish
you could be beautiful too?

and i think
one of the tricks sin tries to do
is to convince us
that sin and i are the same

it tries to
wrap us in enough of itself
that our own identity
feels
interwined

as if
we ARE these negative things
as if
our identity as sinners
should really
or could really be
above our identity
as Jesus sees us
and has done for us
and made us to be

we're not...sin
we're...broken..BY sin
we're ..surrounded by sin
we're lied to, hurt by, and hurt each other
through sin

but we're not sin

our identity
our purpose
is so much
bigger than that

our God

is so much bigger than that

..college is so small
epic
is so small
today
and tomorrow
and the day after that
and sometimes the day before

our now's are always
either so big
or not
big enough

i dont know what im running from
or why my thoughts cant be
expressed
directly

but i think
as direct as i can get

this is
exactly what im thinking

and translating is only
for if you really wanted to know
what it means

or maybe
this is it
or maybe
that was it

..maybe it really doesn't work that way

...
or maybe
it just wont work at all