and you can tell everybody

...that this is your song.

My gift is my song...
and this one's for you
And you can tell everybody that this is your song

"For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life."
-John 3:16

It maybe quite simple,
but now that it's done

"And God said, “Let there be light,”
and there was light."
-Genesis 1:3

I hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind
That I put down in words...

"...because I am fearfully and wonderfully made..."
-Psalm 139:14

How wonderful life is

"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined

now You're in the world

"...what God has prepared for those who love Him."
-1 Corinthians 2:9.

And you can tell everybody

"Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit."
-Matthew 28:19

that this is your song

"God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things..."

It may be quite simple but now that it's done

—and the things that are not—
to nullify the things that are..."
-1 Corinthians 1:28

And you can tell everybody
that this your song.

"...While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
-Romans 5:8

"...how much more, having been reconciled,
shall we be saved through His life"?
-Romans 5:10

red dot.

-"Come here, let me see what happened."

-"It really hurts, I can't tell if it's bleeding.."

-"Hmm..it doesn't look like it's broke through skin..
it looks like you're bleeding on the inside."

-"What does that mean?"

-"It means it was hard enough to break some blood vessels inside,
but not enough to puncture skin."

-"Er..but what does that mean?"

-"It means it's bleeding inside your skin,
but not on the outside."

-"Is it better to bleed on the inside or the inside?"

-"Well, it's fine if it's inside.
It means nothing can get in."

-"...The red mark is getting bigger."

-"That's because you're bleeding on the inside,
so nothing can get out either.
Nothing can get in,
but it also means nothing can get out."

-"...Is it okay?"

-"Yeah, you're okay."

"...It's just gonna hurt a lot for a while, that's all. "

sometimes,
this is what it feels like.

i wonder if it really is better on the inside.

solo para ella

i didn't get a chance to tell you

but what my status meant
was that

my sole reason for being on aim today
was in hopes of getting the chance
to talk
to you <3

and im incredibly happy

that i did =]

thank You.

we put the FUN in funnel,
delu

i miss the people i know

and the ones who know me.

its like craving some sort of comfort food or meal
that you know always cheers you up, and just..feels right.

it's like the feeling of being completely content, just as you are
and being confident that you know who you are
and having confidence even amidst the things
you don't yet know

one shallow feeling of satisfaction
and temporary purpose
will follow one another

until i finally learn to seek
what it is my heart really needs

..im still confident
ill find my way back
but for now i want to let my heart
wander to its content--or rather
discontent

till it knows, sees firsthand
and experiences itself
that amidst all the successes
hurdles leaped,
and mountains climbed

that those accomplishes will be hollow victories
in a race that cant be won

i want to stop trying to be
confident in me

and my efforts
my will
my capabilities
and dreams


id rather
have the confidence
that lasts

...in Him.

transition

"Here we stand
Somewhere in between this moment and the end
Will we bend?
Or will we open up and take this whole thing in?

Everybody else is smiling
And their smiles don't fade
And you don't even wonder
Why you just don't think that way

Maybe you and me got lost somewhere
We can't move or we can't stay here..."

i can't stay here

i want to


i don't

where do You want me to be?


i need to know
what being next to You
looks like

i want to stop walking away
from believing
in You again

thought exhales

..is it true?

are most my friends i hang out with usually..guys?


what do boundaries mean to me
is this one-sided?
am i really as self-aware as i think i am?

..or just selfish, manipulative, a people-pleaser, and a liar?

ahem.
so far every morning ive taken a different
hair tie from my mom's bathroom
and at the end of the day when i take it off,
instead of putting it back i take it off before bed
and put it on their nightstand.
i wonder if by the end of this trip,
ill have successfully moved all her hair ties
from her bathroom sink
to her nightstand.

bwahh...
now that i think about it--
maybe my family actually really WOULD love the game catchphrase D:

in other news--turns out my mom avoids caffeinated teas too D:
its not allowed for my dad, but she avoids it just in case

i wonder
will i be healthy when i grow up..?

im not sure what one hour on a treadmill
actually equates to in running time

do i have the attention span to continuously go for an hour?

..truth is.
as soon as i found out it was
the popsicles that we usually ate--
i was excited to have an excuse to get you
to go back and share one with me again

sometimes i wonder
are you, or do you ever get
as bored as you think i am?

what does 'fun' even mean?

i miss michelle's laughing.
actually--i miss laughing
with michelle.

i also miss talking to yuki =[
i love that talking to nabi is still pick-up-able from where we left off
and i love that me and pri-pri can understand each other
with or without talking
and in the midst of long drawn out rants
about life's
long drawn out
rants

i. am. DEATHLY. afraid
of not getting these personal statements finished =/
i havent heard back...from anyone

other than ray, so far for the later drafts...

im scared that my trying to work ahead will be for nothing
if im unable to get people's feedback on time on it
...sometimes i wish i could just do things on my own
and i have to remind myself its a blessing
not to have to be
...just scary
at the times you feel like
or wonder
if you are

ZOEY IS ADORABLE.

i want one.
not any time soon though,
just to play with and make baked goods with

speaking of--
tomorrow is my late grandpa's bday
and sassy's, our puppy =]

i will make scones < 3 .

you're not so wise, i apologize

and just because i've failed

ive let me fool myself into thinking,
that it could in any way affect or cause or mean
that God will fail.

it's not that i can't hear Him
it's that i still wont
listen

..isn't it always more extreme than you realize it is at the time?

the lie you're buying into at one time or other.

how many of these lies, are lies
because they deny your entire identity
as someone who is His
and in the process
denies His.

by being
consumed
by 'you' entirely.

"who do we think we are?"
-francis chan,
crazy love.

i'm not so wise.