lucky to have stayed where we have stayed

hmm
i'm almost back to eating normal sized meal portions again
i hope that doesn't take india further away
i've written out an official to do list, finally
and have been staying longer on the threadmill,
just because every time a certain time is up
i figure, well since im here i may as well do a lil more

and i wonder if that to do list will go to waste again
or what difference there really supposedly will be in life
change after change, decision after decision, and experience after experience later
im a little less restless, a little more relaxed
but the same level of productive
or lack of

i wonder why people hold hands
i wonder why i ask dumb questions that i,
dont necessarily not know the answer to
but love to hear other people's answers/
interpretations of

i miss--
...


so i really wanna learn how to cook some more
i sit here and look at random recipes, and wish it didnt take so much time
and ingredients i didn't have to make these things

i want to cook for people
and also find a healthier way to convert these recipes
so i can actually feed them to my family without guilt

i wonder if i should write in my private blog more
if thats what itll take to get nabi comments again =[

i miss her <3

i miss company, but i know i have em here

i think id rather--well, no
i dont mind thinking about it
but i think im gonna wanna stop
it doesn't bother me so much
as long as im not being flustered
but either way, there's not really much i can do from here
and also quite possibly not really much thats gonna happen from here

mm
i think im gonna make some hot chocolate
its kinda ironic since its probably still some temperature over a hundred outside

"look! i'm bald, i dont call myself excessively foreheaded syndromed."

haha tv <3

i think God's made it clear that
i'm exactly where i need to be
location-wise too

no more considering selfish decisions dern it.

i think ill make cinnamon buns for the family today =x.
disclaimer, nothing fancy
probably pre-made

hmm
i wish i could make pie for em again
it really woulda been nice to bake with justin
and it really was nice doing that reading with gabe =P
as sick as that sounds, it was fun =]

ive been talking to those two a lot recently
it really does make me thankful for project last year every time

and getting some really genuinely good convos with sonia
just seems to happen every time < 3
i dunno what it is,
SHE makes my "heart flutter" apparently xD

and i feel spoiled to be able to have yuki around
even if she is just doing hw or studying/dying
n n <3 i love--and do get the company

matt ing makes for some esteem building
if or when im able to understand any of the jokes
especially the quantum physics ones =P
and again just very good conversation

i cant wait to catch up with dana eventually
and i finally do feel kept up-ish with michelle
ill track down priya eventually
but things just feel..secure

im meeting stella/starting to talk to her =]
as well as talking more to yvonne,
which is kinda right up there next to amazing < 3

in addition to that i've had some good convos with family members
about relationships with my sis
cute girls at the boba place with my lil brother =P
the family with my mom
and rebellious days with my dad

Schrödinger's cat
midnight boba
jason mraz
phone dates
and lemon meringue pies

gasp!
an IM from Nabi now !! *_*